holiday vacation

Tuesday, December 30, 2003

I have to admit that I just erased an entire entry that I knew I would regret had I posted it on the Internet. This is where the lines of personal vs. public journal cross. And venting here about issues I have with other people who place a close-role in my life just is not appropriate regardless of how enticing it may be. I want to vent and yell and scream and rant. But that wouldn't be fair and that wouldn't be nice. And that fact that I'm even stating this paragraph is probably toting the line a bit -- but it is a risk I'll take. If you know me in real life and want to discuss this further, bring it on. My grumpy and ready for a fight.

Needless to say, the holidays can be stressful They bring out the best and worst in people, myself included. I see qualities in other people that make me want to jump out of my skin and have to realize that I, in all likelihood, have similar qualities that are driving other people nuts. There are no two-ways about it: too much together time just magnifies issues. And nothing will seem as awful or infuriating once time and space enters the equation. I take solace in this knowledge. I know I must have patience. Nothing is that big of a deal.

So. Well. Happy holidays, everyone!

I do want to say that I do have an amazing family and James and I had the opportunity to climax our holiday season visiting not one, but two sets of family. Typically, we stay up north due to circumstance and distance. My family just happens to be closer and that is who we normally see on Christmas and Thanksgiving. But this year, I knew I had some vacation coming since I've been at my job now for a year and I suggested to James we visit his family in Tennessee. This pleased his mother. We even set about surprising his grandmother and other relatives.

So, on the Tuesday before Christmas Eve, we packed up our car and headed south with one minor detour. That detour being Madison, Wi and my parents. There we spent Christmas Eve (I got my hair done at my old Wisconsin salon. Love you, CV!) and we feasted with my family. Dinner is always a big thing with my family considering the tastes and cookery skills of both my mother and husband. James and I planned the menu and thanks to the magical combination of Whole Foods and Mollie Katzen, there were fresh asparagus crepes with a spiked mushroom sauce. There was a curry butternut squash soup. There was even meat of some kind -- but forgive me if I didn't pay attention to that part. And there was vodka. Lots and lots of vodka.

Now, I know what I'm about to write makes some people think I am a bit of an alcoholic. In fact, I would guess my mother-in-law would be the first to step up to assert that fact. But I come from a family of drinkers. Social drinks. And I'm married to a drinker. Honestly, I do think we imbibe with responsibility. We enjoy it. Of course, we also have the tendency to go overboard on holidays. (I'm from Wisconsin. What can I say?)

So, on Christmas Eve, there were martinis. Having just introduced my brother to the virtues of quality vodka, the entire family (minus my eleven-year-old sister) was in the spirit. Literally. James cooked dinner. Erik (my brother) and I listened to my sister play her saxophone. Candles were lit. Everyone was merry. And dinner was superb. Some old neighbors of my parents arrived as we were finishing our food. It was then that the impulse hit me to announce to the entire room that I was officially drunk.

(Yeah. That's a story that is already being told repeatedly.)

After dinner, we opened presents and basked in the glow of the fire. My sister was perhaps the most cunning gift-giver in the room on account of the singing stuffed dog that barked "Deck the Halls" every time you squeezed him. As you can imagine, this made for much entertainment as were the matching Norwegian caps that all the kids, sans me, seemed to get. At some point, my brother and his wife had to leave. My sister went to bed and I fell asleep on the couch while James and my mother assisted Santa with his loot.

The next morning, James and I had hoped to leave town by 8am. But it was Christmas morning. My sister was running around with the guitar that Santa had brought her (yes, she is very musically inclined). And the atmosphere was just too rosy to speed away from. We ended up leaving at 9:55 am exactly. I remember because the time was a mere five minutes before the rest of my step-siblings were due to arrive for the traditional Christmas brunch.

To tell you the truth, my Christmas day was mostly a blur of truck stops and potty breaks. We ate lunch at what I guess was the only open restaurant on all of of I-57. It was a depressing salad bar. But better than cornets and a pepsi, so who am I to complain? James and I were also quickly aware of the fact that we were back in the SOUTH amid the accents, sweet tea and numerous interstate-seated churches. (Did anyone know that this giant cross existed? It scared me greatly. Greatly. And what is even scarier? There is wallpaper for your desktop!)

We arrived at James' mother's home in Clarksville, Tennessee (home of the 101st Airborne Division) sometime after 8pm. I could tell how thankful his mother was to have him there for the holiday. She was also psyched about the coming surprise since no one else knew we were in town. We feasted on leftovers for dinner, but that was okay. There was candlelight. And it was Christmas. (Did I mention that the leftovers included good ole Southern biscuits? Yum....)

The next morning, we lazily awoke to Tryna needing to go out and potty. We had left Sienna in Madison with my mom since we figured we could only bring one dog with us to Tennessee. We spent our day after Christmas eating blueberry pancakes, reading books in our pajamas and finally showering sometime after noon in order to make our dinner plans in Nashville.

James' grandmother hosted dinner and James' mother went in first without us to keep up the ruse. Then she said she left something in the car, grabbed us and then shocked his grandmother. I think there were tears. I know there were hugs. It was all very sweet. James' grandmother is a beautiful, small Philippino-Oriental woman who turned 81 today. She is graceful and strong and we walks the malls with her girlfriends for exercise. She loves a good Asti Spumoni and plays bridge regularly. Each time I see her, I wish we lived nearer. The fact that James still has a grandparent alive makes me incredibly jealous. He's a lucky man and I hope we have many more holidays ahead of us to spend with her.

Dinner also included his aunt and uncle, his uncle's wife, and two of their kids. We ate traditional Southern holiday food (including cornbread stuffing) and caught up with one another's lives. One of us is in customer service and is looking for a new job. Another just traveled to Greece for school. I heard salon stories and tales of holiday's past. It was your typical family gathering.

It was over way too fast. Soon we were back in our car and on our way back to Clarksville. But the evening couldn't have been better.

The next few days are more hazy. We haven't done much more than hang around the house. James brought our bikes down and the weather has been unseasonably warm. Warms like 60s warm so it has been perfect. Unfortunately, James also bought me some Speedplay pedals for my bike (which he switched out unknowingly to me) and then I couldn't get them to work (we think one may be defective) so, in actuality, only he was able to ride over our time here. Still, he got to put on so many miles while I know I ran over 13 in balmy conditions such as this. So who can complain?

Due to the fact that James' mother was having her car repaired, we stayed close to home in order to be available for transportation. We did make a stop at the Beachhaven Winery. I was pleasantly surprised by the wines. Who knew that those Clarksville, TN fold could make such fine wine? They can!! Surprise! Their Merlot turned out to be one of the best I've ever had. (Although, I am not much of a Merlot person -- so maybe real Merlot aficionados wouldn't agree). Still, good wine. And I also really dug their Classic White as well was their Jazz! which is semi-sweet and, I would guess, would pair well with a rich, custard-y dessert.

So, that is about it for our holiday recap. Soon, an old high school friend of James' will be here for dinner. In addition to joining us for dinner, he's also got a new hard drive for my computer, the sweetheart. It is about time I increased my powerbook's capacity and he's, luckily, in the field.

Speaking of high school friends of James', it occurs to me that there was one thing that I had confidentily forgotten. That one thing being "cruising with the boys." Yes, I went cruising. I can't say I understood it. But last night, I was taken on a tour of Clarksville's back roads. The driver confessed all the places he gotten high and made out. James and the boys giggled. Seriously, they giggled. And if we weren't in our thirties, I might have found it all slightly entertaining. The truth however is that I *am* in my thirties and I do prefer a good old-fashioned bar stool with drink on the table while I reminisce about old times. Go figure.

At any rate, happy new year ya'll. As entertaining as the South has been, I can't WAIT to get home.

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